Getting older

Here I am in the quiet of the moment to reflect on life. For the first time I am facing the impact of old age on my physical body. My back is more stiff and I am now almost working for two months to recover from a knee entry. A time to reflect on the quality of my life as I enter the latter part of this life. Can I still make a difference? Can I still shadow my legacy to be of more value to following generations. Stoic philosophy teaches “momento mori”, death is near.

My dream

I dream of establishing a school or institution aimed at creating a whole human with an inner balance and harmony to build a better future for generations to come. The school will revolve around the development of four base practices philosophy, art, science and spirituality. Not seperate themes but showing how each link with the other.

Synchronicities, meditation and awareness

How do you experience synchronicities in your life?

I choose to see meaning in any type of synchronicity… I found that it makes life far more interesting and creative. I am more mindful of events around me because I am always looking to discover a moment of significance. Peope can argue whether about whether or not synchronicities have actual meaning or is just coincidence. However when you choose to be aware of synchronicities and allow it to guide you, then it has a profound impact on your awareness and curiosity of life. Ultimately after making it part of your lifestyle, then you begin to trust that there is an inate wisdom in the universe that responds to the vibrations of your total being.

How does meditation influence your communication?

Meditation improved my concentration and mindfulness to be present when talking to others. I am able to quiet my mind so that I can listen attentatively. I am more aware of need expressed by other people and less hasty to give them a thoughtless piece of my mind and rather communicate with mindful peace. My meditation made me aware of my energetic connection with other human beings and dissolved the anxiety of the illusion of seperation. The people I meet in life reflects my needs in life, my opportunities to serve humanity. So I communicate we with more curiosity, concentration and fellow-feeling.

How to deal with destructive and impulsive behaviour?

Question: How does a Stoic philosopher deal with destructive and impulive behavior; especially when it is people close to you like family:

There is a classic quotation where Marcus Aurelius reminds himself in the beginning of the day of the types of behaviors that he will have to deal with during the day. You have already concluded that the reactions or actions of other people are outside of your control. One way to deal with it is to simply prepare yourself for those people by expecting those type of behaviors and return yourself to what is in your control. You must use your own reason to think about alternative ways to deal with such behaviors in terms of your reaction to them. You will soon discover that reacting emotionally towards impulsive or destructive behaviors or will not assist you at all to deal with them. Philosophy begins with fellow-kindness which means a Stoic have a deep respect for other people irrespective their behavior and always address them with respect; never in a derogatory or insulting manner. Secondly let people know that they are responsible for their own actions so do not shift blame onto yourself for the actions of others. Within your control is to communicate with them with much clarity as possible how their behavior has a negative impact on their own life as well as that of others.
If your message is not heard, you can find new and creative ways to convey the same message to make it easier for other people to hear and accept. The key is that the Stoic is patient, working on himself to improve his communication and behavior rather than forcefully trying to change other people. So the Stoic exerts an influence through reason but do not attach to any outcome. If the message is heard then it it great but if it is rejected the stoic finds a new way of conveying the message. He continues to hone his own skills and interaction rather than focusing on whether the other person is right or wrong. Stoicism is not passive, it is persistent but that persistence is based on work on oneself. Stoics will also reason and ask you what makes the difference between your “own blood” and a stranger. If the same behavior in a stranger does not effect you but that of your “own blood” does then it means it is not the behavior that impacts on you but your reaction to the behavior and your reaction to the behavior is within your control. By adding that perspective to your awareness, it will give you a bit of distance so that you do not get caught up in the emotion itself so that you can deal with the issue with a more reasoned approach.
You can try to do the following:
  1. Remind yourself that you will have to deal with impulsive and destructive behavior and decide up front how you will deal with that behavior.
  2. Be aware that it is your perception of the behavior that influence you rather than the behavior itself.
  3. Be patient and consistently focus on how you can change your communication and behavior to bring a positive approach to the situation.

Stoic debate

How does a Stoic approach an argument or debate?

The four stoic values apply wisdom, justice, courage and moderation.

Wisdom implies that we acknowledge our nature as beings of reason, meaning we act from the best of our reasoning capability in that we search for truth irrespective our existing position on a debate. The door remains open to our best view of the facts on the table and differentiating between what is fact and what is merely opinion. When we use reason we put a high regard on logic as the underlying governance that drives the debate. We seek the logic in another opinion, and we test the logic for its consistency, integrity and coherency. If we find one view superior based on logic we accept that view and argue it further. If a viewpoint has an obvious flaw, false premise or flaw we reject that reasoning. If we have doubt whether any of the arguments are superior in term of logic we follow a constructivist approach assuming both reflect something of the truth and that our difference lies in our own ignorance not to see the unity of the two or to see a flaw in one that is wrong. So the search continues and the debate continues until we find a better solution that has no ambiguity within it or that is superior to the existing arguments.
Justice implies an acknowledgement of our social nature. Philosophy begins with fellow-kindness. So irrespective the degree of difference we always respect the other person for who they are. We might perceive something they promote as unfair and reject that argument but that does not mean we do not respect the other person. So in essence we accept the right of everybody to have an opinion but with the responsibility to defend the reasonableness and justice of an argument. So everybody must be listened to with due consideration during an argument and debate and there argument looked at in full. But we also have the right to test it and weigh it.
Courage is needed to stand up for what you know is right, reasoned and tested. Sometimes the other person is a person of importance or the voice of a majority. To stand your own ground because you truly know your view is right against powers are truly the inherent power of the Stoic. This done without getting upset or getting emotional. It is done by simply keeping the focus on the rightness of the reasoning we follow. A Stoic places his own reasoning and mind above other opinions because the Stoic followed through to test each of his premises, challenge each conclusion and truly investigated other arguments with care and consideration. When that is done, then it is time to stand firm on a position because a Stoic can only stand by that which is defined by being coherent, logical and truthful.
Moderation means never to be caught up in extremes. There is a calm confidence, rather than arrogance, with a Stoic, having exercised the best of his reasoning ability and having showed an openness to truly investigate alternatives. So the Stoic may deliver a passionate plea for a cause but in the end it is the reason and logic that must be victorious. The idea is important not the person presenting the idea. Good arguments tested and logical will stood the test of time and cannot be vanquished.
So how does a Stoic conduct himself?
  • Value reason and logic above all else
  • Listen with respect and and an open mind to other arguments
  • Have the courage to stand by the best argument in terms of its internal coherency, integrity and logic.
  • Do not attach to outcomes e.g. don’t expect to convince others to change there mind focus on putting forward the argument you have with grace, accuracy and with consideration.